Voodoo for Miss Maverick
I dinna like Miss Maverick
This cushion’s for her heid
I’m jumpin aw ma weicht on it
And noo Miss Maverick’s deid.
Ye’re deid, ye’re deid, Miss Maverick
And never mair ye’ll say
I dance like a hird o Ayrshire kye
On a mercat day.
I’ll pit ye ablaw the sofa
Ye’re deid and yirdit baith
An never mair ye’ll miscaw me –
Ye’ve drawn yer hindmaist braith.
Sandy Thomas Ross]
The Auld Troot
The auld bron troot lay unner a stane,
Unner a stae lay he,
An he thoct o’ the wund,
An he thocht o’ the rain,
An the troot that he uist tae be.
A’m a gey auld troot, said he tae hissel,
A gey auld troot, said he,
An there’s mony a queer-like
Tale A cuid tell
O’ the things that hae happened tae me.
They wee-hafflin trooties are aa verra smert,
They’re aa verra smert, said he,
They ken aa the rules
O’ the gemm aff by hairt,
An they’re no aften catched, A’ll agree.
They’re thinkin A’m auld an they’re thinkin A’m duin,
They’re thinkin A’m duin, said he,
They’re thinkin A’m no
Worth the flirt o’ a fin
Or the blink o’ a bonnie black ee.
But A’m safe an A’m smug in ma bonnie wee neuk,
A’m safe an A’m snug, said he,
A’m the big fush that
Nae fusher can heuk,
An A’ll aye be that – till A dee!
by Sandy Thomas Ross
A Dug! A Dug!
Hey, daddy, wid ye get us a dug?
A big broon alsatian ur a wee white pug?
Ur a skinny wee terrier ur a big fat bull?
Aw daddy, get us a dug wull ye?
Whit! An whose dug’ll it be when it dirties the flerr,
An pees’n the carpet, an messes the sterr?
It’s me ur yer mummy’ll be taen fur a mug,
Awa oot ‘n play, yur no gettin adug.
But daddy thur gien thum away
Doon therr at the R.S.P.C.A.,
Yu’ll get wan fur nothin’ so yi will
Aw, daddy get us a dug wull ye?
Do ye hear um oan aboot dugs again?
Ah think that ane’s goat dugs oan the brain.
Ah know whit ye’ll get, a clip roon the lug
If a hear ony mair aboot this blumming dug.
Aw daddy it widny be dear tae keep,
An ah’d mak it a basket fur it tae sleep.
Aw daddy, get us a dug wull ye?
Ah don’t think thur’s ever been embdy like you,
Ye could whiddle a twist oot a flamming corkscrew,
Noo, get doon aff ma knenk,
Gies nane o yer hugs,
Aw right that’s anuff, I’ll get ye a dug!
AW, DADDY, A DUG! A DUG!
Bill Keys
Royal Mile Primary School 